“I Love You” Exercise
The work I do revolves around self-care and self-healing. Though I’ve been on my conscious journey of healing for nearly two decades, I still continue to heal and grow. My childhood, youth, and adulthood have not been easy, but I’ve been able to persevere and succeed through the love of people around me and by the divine love within me.
This very powerful exercise came to me spontaneously one night. It was exactly what I needed in the moment and wanted to share it in case others could benefit from it. I am going to use the words I used that night, so it will get a little personal. Since we’ve all had our own experiences, please replace my words and ages to those that fit you and benefit you most.
It’s best to find a place that’s quiet where you won’t be disturbed. Take a couple deep breaths to relax your body and your mind. (This actually came to me while I was in the tub; a great place for quiet reflection.)
Close your eyes. Place your right hand up to your left shoulder. Place your left hand up to your right shoulder. While your arms are crossed over your heart center, simple say (out loud or in your mind) “I love you”. Take a deep breath…exhale. Say it again. “I love you”. Allow your words to sink into your chest. Say it again. “I love you”.
Now, bring your right hand down to your heart chakra (center of your chest). Place your left hand over your right hand. Tell yourself again, I love you. Repeat these beautiful words to yourself as many times as you like. I think I said it 15-20 times. Each time you say it, allow yourself to feel the words “I love you”.
At this point, I saw myself looking inside my mother’s womb and saw myself as a fetus. (My mother didn’t want me from the time of conception, so this is where I began this part of the exercise). I looked at the little dot that was me and whispered “I love you”.
Then I saw my newborn-self unattended in my crib right after birth. (My mother had told me she didn’t hold me the week she was in the hospital after giving birth to me. She had four other kids at home and needed the rest). I saw my newborn-self. I picked her up, sat in a rocking chair, held her close and whispered “I love you”.
My internal vision flashed to when I was around 6-7 months old. I was sitting in the middle of the floor, like I had been abandoned. I picked her up, cradled her, and told her “I love you”.
Then I saw myself as a toddler. The look on my face was a mix of confusion, fear, and sorrow. I picked her up, held her, and told her “I love you”.
I repeated this for my 7-8 year old self and 11-12 year old self.
When I got to my teenage self, I felt disappointment creep in. I started to even use that word. Then I stopped. I put my arm around my teenage-self and I thanked her for not giving in. I showed her compassion and understanding for all that she had been through and I acknowledged that she did the best she could and I’m proud of her strength and perseverance. I looked her in the eyes and said “I love you”.
Fast forward to my young adulthood. I sat with her and thanked her for being such a great single mom. The kids she raised are incredible. I spent a few moments sharing what she had accomplished in those years as a single parent. I thanked her for your strength and for beginning this beautiful journey of healing. Then I hugged her and told her “I love you”.
I brought myself back into the moment. While my hands were still over my heart, I said to myself “I love you”. I stayed here, in this energy, for a few moments.
Then, I saw an older version of myself. She came to me and told me how proud she is of me and all that I have overcome. She pointed out that through this journey of pain and suffering, I was able to feel love and compassion for others. And through this journey, I have touched the hearts of many. She told me to keep up the good work. Then she wrapped her arms around me and told me “I love you”.
I couldn’t help but take another deep breath; especially because the tears had already been flowing.
As I felt the energy of those words “I love you” flow through me, I was reminded of something greater and deeper. When I meditate, I bring in the divine light from above and allow it to flow through me. I know this light is always flowing through me, but this felt more personal.
I imagined this light streaming down from above, entering my crown chakra, and flowing throughout my body. As I did, I was reminded that this light is Pure, True, Unconditional Love. When my soul was first created, it was solely made of this light. Pure, True, Unconditional Love. Love is who I am at my core. Love is what flows through and washes over me.
As I felt this great force of Love flow through my being, it became stronger and more intense. So much so that I felt my hands spontaneously release sending Love out into the world. I put my hands back on my heart center, felt the enormity of Love, and then released it again out into the world.
That night, in that moment, I needed to feel the touch and love of myself for myself. That infinite source of Love is what has kept me going all these years. It has allowed me to show that same love to others in my life and on my journey.
It brought me home. Home is where the heart is. What does the heart represent? Love.
Reflecting upon this exercise, it also brought me to hope. When I reflect upon my life, there have been far more dark days than light. However, the enormity of that light far outweighs the dark. Having moments of feeling the light gave me hope to keep going; that I would feel it again someday. And, I continue to. Life is much better these days as I’m open to and aware of love. This exercise simply brought me home; where I’m truly from and what I’m truly made of.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. I wish you much love and light on your journey!